What Could Go Wrong?

Part the Third. Semi-inspired by a recent freshwater excursion.

1. Ice volcanoes.

2. Getting to town 10 minutes after two out of the three grocery stores have closed. Scouring the third grocery store for the sole ingredient needed, in vain.

3. Climate change warming the cold lakes of the world, enough that their bacterial populations shift and decomposition begins in earnest on all their sunken corpses, causing said corpses to bloat and rise to the surface. (This is entirely hypothetical, for now, but I shall remain vigilant.)

4. The ubiquitousness of the latest album by a pop star I dislike. The irruption of this album into what would otherwise have been a perfectly nice experience eating in a restaurant that serves only salads.

5. Trying to remember the first line of “Barrett’s Privateers,” and only being able to come up with the first line of “Greenland Whale Fisheries” instead. (In my defense: both of them start with a year.)

6. Disappointing gourd festival.

7. Birthday present shipping on a delay.

8. Large-scale Lego theft.

9. Sea lampreys.

10. Amazon returns.